See, this is the problem...
Mon 2007-07-02 23:55:47 (in context)
- 459 words (if poetry, lines) long
So I showed the story to one more person. She liked it, too, but mentioned two things that could be changed. So I thought, "OK, quick revision and send it off!"
Which I did today (having been felled to uselessness by the heat yesterday).
Only, aside from those two things, I kept running into *klunk* and *ick* and *oh give me a break.* So I did a lot of revising on the sentence by sentence level. And I read it to myself and thought, "Hot damn. That's great!"
Then I gave to my husband for a final read through.
He wasn't happy with the changes. That's an understatement; what he actually said was, "It died."
ArrrggghhhhH!!!!!!!!
So we went back and forth as to what killed it and how to revive it. The big things I agreed with: too much detail nails down the ineffable and makes it sound like a police report. The little things, though... "Doesn't this sentence just sound better?" "Well, no." "Why not?!" "Not sure. It just doesn't work."
So I have not submitted this story anywhere yet. I've sent copies out for second opinions. And I'm going to sleep on it.
Thing about my husband is, he may not be able to articulate exactly why something doesn't work, but he can definitely tell me when something doesn't work. If a piece sings, or fails to sing, he hears that. So I trust his diagnosis. I just can't get over how the old draft clunks here and there and apparently sings for everyone but me.
And that's the problem. Sometimes feedback leaves me feeling like there's absolutely nothing I can do. Like I can't trust my own judgment. Like I suck at revising, so why try? Which is not to blame anyone giving me feedback, of course. Absolutely not. Anyone who's willing to give me feedback, I treasure that. If only I could figure out how to use that feedback rather than get paralyzed by it.
Like I said: Sleep. Tomorrow for working miracles. Miracles are over for tonight.